I truly love what I do. Yes, I really do laugh like this ALL the time at work.
I struggled a lot about whether to write this or not. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m sweating as we speak (how’s that for a lovely image for you). Here’s why I decided to try to put into words what I’m feeling right now. I think, or at least hope, the reason you come to our office is not only the quality of work we do, but more importantly, because of how we make you feel. What you see is what you get. We are REAL. Real women who love what they do and are having a blast while doing it. This is why this crazy situation we are all in has been so difficult - mentally, physically, emotionally, and financially.
I am one of those lucky few who truly loves what they do. Loves teeth? What a weirdo. Yup, this weirdo loves teeth. But what I also love and feed off of is the human connection. I love chatting (I think all of you can agree with that one), laughing extremely loudly (shocker), and just being with my patients. Not being able to come to work is devastating. Not being able to help my patients by offering them to come in so I can take them out of pain leaves me feeling completely helpless. Basically not being able to do what I love feels like a piece of me is missing.
The best team a girl could ever wish for.
Then there’s the girls. In the dental field, there tends to a pretty regular turnover of team members. Not mine. I hit the absolute dental jackpot when it comes to my team of gals (knocking on wood as we speak). Having to lay them off for the time being, knowing the stress that puts on them, and not being able to see them has literally kept me up at night. I feed off of them and when that’s missing, things just don’t seem whole.
Now a bit more about what’s going with me. Holy smokes how do stay at home moms do it?! Being at home with both kids all day, homeschooling, meals, snacks, trying to get some work done, I can’t even! (Shout out to my super sweet patient who waited as my kids barged into my room and began singing at the top of their lungs while I was on the phone with her trying to figure out what happened to her tooth). Anyone feel like they are more exhausted now than before this whole thing happened?! I literally thought I would have time to do the things I never had time for before like organizing the closets, cleaning out the basement, reading that book I never started. Nope! How is it that I am forced not to work and be at home but still don’t have time?!
My family. Love these humans, but boy being with them 24 hours a day really does test your love!
Now to the part that is seen as a definite faux pas that no one really talks about - the financial stress. Let’s be real, no one is going to feel sorry for a dentist. Am I extremely lucky to be well compensated to do something that I love? Absoutely, without a shadow of a doubt. Are there well established dentists out there who have been practicing and owned their practice for decades, with savings who this situation will be easier for? Yup. Am I one of those dentists? Nope. I wish, I would love a new bag, hahahahaha. Just kidding. Sort of.
The hard truth is I’m still a young practicing dentist who is a new business owner. I have dental school debt, a business loan for buying into this practice that I love with all my soul, and then to top it all off, a renovation that is still continuing on with no revenue coming in for the foreseeable future. I have zero income that my family relies on and due to the nature of my work when we do go back, we are one of the highest risk as we work in the mouth.
Now, please know this is not meant to be a “Feel sorry for Sunayna and let’s throw her a pity party” post, but if you want to, I’m happy to join the party you throw for me virtually! I like Beyonce FYI. But seriously here’s what I know after a lot of soul searching:
Miss you all everyday. I can’t wait to see your smiles again soon.
EVERYONE is struggling, not just me. EVERYONE is hurting. EVERYONE is trying their best to navigate this.
GRATITUDE. Despite what I may be going through right now, I know others have it worse. I have gratitude for the time my family has together - bedtimes that I miss sometimes due to work, meals together, and all the playing. I have gratitude for the shelter I have, food we eat, and the ability and option to stay home while others risk their lives for us.
JOY. I refuse to let this bring me down. From the moment I walked into Niverville Heritage Dental Centre I just knew I was meant to be here. I work so dang hard. The girls work so hard. So we are going to continue with the renovation. I will not let it be a source of stress when it was always meant to be a source of excitement, pride, and pure joy. Whenever we open, I promise you it will be a space that the girls and I deserve to work in and a space that you deserve to be treated in. In the end, I choose JOY.
If you read this far, gosh, I owe you a complimentary exam when we open. Just joking, I’m broke remember? Hahaha. But seriously thank you. Know that I dream every night of coming back and seeing all of you again. I honestly can’t wait. Stay safe. Miss you.
Much love,
Sunayna